Forget the pity and just party

Feb 5, 2014

And I mean party in the most stay at home mom of three kind of way! It is no secret that my husband is gone a lot, as most military spouses can relate. Chris and I have probably spent more time apart than we have together. I don't want to say you ever get used to it because you don't, but you do just accept it and move on. There is nothing you can do to change it so kicking and screaming won't help. Trust me I did all that in the beginning, getting upset does nothing besides put you in a funk for the duration of the time spent apart. So for me and my sanity I have to embrace the time I have alone. I am definitely one of those people that needs my space, my husband is the same way, so time apart has always proven to be healthy for us. Distance makes the heart grow fonder and fonder and fonder.... 

So let me point out some of the positives to having a husband who is gone for weeks or months...

High on my list is the fact that I use this time to not give a crap about shaving my legs! I mean even when my husband is here he is lucky if I get both legs shaved. While in the shower I am lucky to get one shaved before a child threatens war. My husband thinks this is hilariously gross...but I call it insulation, it is cold up here, I'll take all the extra warmth I can get. 

Another positive is how many less loads of laundry there is. Chris changes clothes probably three times a day between gym clothes, his uniform, and bumming around the house clothes, it starts to add up. So when he is gone my washer and dryer get a much needed break. And I am usually able to get all the other loads of laundry that have been sitting in piles, folded and put away without having to worry about whether or not there is clean tan colored anything for G.I. Joe. 

Food! I am driven by food. My husband is too...he can out eat a family of 12 so when he isn't here all the food is mine. Well, I do throw some the kids' way every once in a while but for the most part its all mine. Chris is the healthy eater out of the two of us. My overeating carb habits actually drive him crazy, so when he is home I try to make more "healthy" choices, except for Sunday dinner. I will never substitute any healthy version of Italian food on a Sunday. My grandmother would curse me from her grave if I ever altered Sunday sauce, pasta, and sausage. Plus we are Italian's we eat...its just what we do. So when Chris is gone I indulge in all the chocolate, pizza, french fries, and I'll throw a banana in there for good measure. I am like a bear preparing for hibernation! Then when the husband returns he likes to make fun of how I am now back in healthy eating hell. (side note- my kids take after their father, they would rather have a bowl of apples and strawberries over chips and dip).
Sweats...I am a great lover of all things fashion as you can tell by my instagram. But I love me a good pair of comfy sweats. One pair in particular are a pair from college that are faded, stretched out thanks to three pregnancies, and ripped at the bottom. Chris loathes these sweats, he has tried to throw them out before, but I will not let that happen. So when he is gone I live in them. And after an incredibly frustrating day of solo parenting I can plop myself down on the couch after the kids are in bed and eat a medium pizza while watching endless amounts of trashy reality tv.

Not to mention I get a king size bed shared with Avalon to myself, so I sleep in a star position completely stretched out, I am just trying to take up as much room as possible. And I don't have to get woken up at some ungodly hour by the worlds loudest siren for an alarm clock. 

But one of the biggest positives for me at least, is that I genuinely appreciate when he returns, not just for the sake of an extra set of hands. But I am bored without him here, our house is like a party with no music. It sucks...but we try to make the best of it. And he comes home with outrageous stories, and I always have a good tale or two to tell. Then every waking moment is devoted to the kids until the next time the calendar pops up "Chris leaves".


  1. I always try to look at the bright side when the significant other is gone. I totally agree with the laundry thing. Camis take up so much space in the washing machine. And why do they need to wear so many different outfits in one day?? I am opposite about eating though. I can eat quinoa til' my hearts content with my husband complaining!

  2. Awh. That last paragraph was so sweet. ;) I think that's a pretty decent list. When Matt goes away for work i enjoy going to bed early. He is a night owl and I love sleep. No guilt. I go straight to bed after the kids.

    Doesn't his alarm wake Avalon up? Or is she already awake? These are the things that my mind ponders...

  3. Some day you should post your Italian recipes :) Sorry he's gone so much, but what a great way to look at things!

  4. I agree about posting your Italian recipes!! And you're pretty much super mom...just saying.

  5. I miss Kyle but I also enjoy the time to myself to do the things that want to (not that he has a probably doing what I want to).

  6. Kelsey!!! I LOOVED this post! I'm definitely relating with you right now! It really is boring without the husband around!

  7. There are things I love about my husband going away too, of course, I always miss him the second he's gone.



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