I grew up with a mom who owned her own business, she had an office at home but was very rarely available even when she was in there. She was 100% go go go all the time! I saw that she had help in every aspect, someone to take us to school and pick us up, a cleaning lady, a gardener, a pool guy, at one point even a cook to come in and prepare many meals to freeze. She worked hard, harder than I have ever seen someone work. Even raising five kids, I can tell you she wasn't doing it all. She couldn't be in five places at one time. I can remember on Friday nights when my brother would have a football game she would watch the first half of his game, then race across town to come watch me cheer at the second half of my schools game. Weekends she would be running around from braiding my hair at a horse competition, to cheering at the sidelines for my sisters soccer game, to my brother's basketball game, with my youngest brother and sister in tow. It was all nuts all the time. (The daughter apple doesn't fall far from the mother tree). Even now looking back my mom will tell you that she loves to work, not that she didn't love being a mom, but she enjoyed and still does, that time and energy put into her business. My hat goes off to working moms who play that role during the day and come home only to change into a different costume and take care of children.
Being a stay at home mom I can see the need for an outlet. For me that is fashion. Leaving my job in merchandising didn't mean my love for creating outfits went away. If anything it grew stronger, so I make time for it. I don't get dressed during the day for anyone besides myself. My kids could careless if I wore a trash bag around the house. Chris is always amazed that I find time to shower. But for me, that time in my closet putting myself together is the time I need. While I take the time to do that something else is not being done. Whether that be the dishes, the laundry, the chalk left in the driveway from a morning of playing, those damn legos, dinner prep, the list could go on and on. What I am saying is, that when we see someone who appears to have it "all together" they chose to put energy into that portrayal that day. For some moms it is working out, making that time to clear their head and feel good about themselves, but I can guarantee that finding that time isn't easy. That they are sacrificing something else to attain it. It's a circus act that no one is able to perform flawlessly.
It is something I have to constantly remind myself of. That it is okay to say no to things, that I in fact cannot do it all. There is no need to make excuses for it, I do the best I can when I can. There is no shame in asking for help when it is needed, or hiring help for that matter. Or doing neither and just learning to live in a mess! Ha!
So while having it all and doing it all may seem great, I like a side of dysfunction to round out a healthy dose of my day. And maybe a little more coffee, because the kids are asleep and there are no clean forks for breakfast in the morning.